more as this nite rolls on and on and on.......

lets see i have put up with the rolling of eyes~ the smart ass comments~ the caffeine overload~the annoying waiting and more annoying waiting~ an old woman who cant seem to make a phone call without you actually puttn her fingers on the key pad jeeez she reminds me of susan only susans not that old. ~ no biscuits but donuts -great keep that up i will be 5000 lbs. i watch my weight and ppl say i dont need to cause im thin as a rail ~yeah ah k thats why im thin becuz i dont eat like a starved cow. i guess we are in for the long haul here and imah not ah happy bouts it. im takin all stairs out of my head for any future. what a random thought.~soon it will be time for the sun up crowd and i hate sunny morning ppl they make me gag. if you dont live in a storybook smiling with sparkly teeth then save the happy ho ho fun time for any time its not early morning. these fake phoney ppl around this place comin up with their 'can i get u anything dear' yep you can tell me what i need to kno and leave me the hell alone' but oh no cant have any peace. ya kno i cant help but wonder after everything ive heard if that old woman gert didnt somhow have sumthin to do with all this. if she did she will get mah mouth fer shur.
ive ah been told any time a calamity hits that family its her fault. thats a change from everytime sumthin hits here its either mah fault or mikes fault. but this ah time im missin sleep to do this and if she caused it then i want reprible damage kickbacks. caffeine time again.

Sometimes....................

Sometimes crying is an option other times screaming other times just drifting into nothingness and waiting for another day....................................................................
So I asked God: "Why is Gert still here?" "Why is Amy around and having to be dealt with?" "Why does Tamara breathe?" Some things just dont have answers.
Why do good people die and evil live and flourish its like the center of a tootsie roll tootsie pop, the world may never know.

SHAZZBAHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

one time just one time culdnt i get things my way!!!!!
i am tired of doin things the way a man wants them done.
mah ex and mah present clash like the warriors and dont stop to think of mah feelings!
disgusted by the drag tonite but used to the fights the quarrels and the disturbances that all
center around my daughter. i am in a whine mood. there shuld be no arguments on this.
im her mother and mike shuld have given just a little to let me have mah way but no!
resigned.

aggravated about conflict with our lil stacy

our daughter had a fit, a tantrum, a total breakdown i guess you could call it today. i felt confused when i first got the call and so im standing out talking to her daddy while pam is watching her and she was busting it to pam. shes suddenly screaming and pitching those tantrums she used to when she was two. shes back on that thing of me and her daddy getting back together. we have told her repeatedly its not going to happen and she encouraged katy to get into trouble becuz she was mad and acting out so katy ended up lighting a paper towel on fire. when robert found out what she had done he walked in and swatted stacys butt so hard for encouraging katy that stacy actually lifted up into the air off the floor and then she was screaming and crying. you would have thought he tried to murder her. he smacked her butt once but the crying went on for a while and robert was not encouraging to her until he calmed down and then he talked with her but by then he and i already had a differencing of opinion and the bitch of a neighbor wanted to get involved as if it was any of her business. i hate nosey people who try to get up in your business when you dont ask em to. i discussed this with mike and hes as usual no help thinking stacy is spoiled and needs a good butt beating. we disagree on this violently. pam was on my side and got onto robert for smacking her butt. stacy gets like this sometimes but her tantrums are hard to take and he thinks hes taking her away from me to go live in florida? hmph!! we'll see. i hope their other plans work out cause if not mike and i will be going to florida. hes not takin my lil girl away from me! pam is good to her but stacy needs her mother too. sometimes i wonder how much she needs her daddy though. he is too harsh with her and i have a real problem with that. he doesnt see my side on anything and we should be together on how to raise our daughter.
i have told him to use spanking as a last resort and i really think he hits her too hard. she cried for a solid 45 min. katy was to scared not to listen to robert and she stood in a corner where he put her. i will get over it but i was mad. mike is not supportive on this. he thinks for good measure we shuld just get up everyday and spank her so she behaves that day. what the hell is wrong with guys?

Thing I I dont understand.....

I always get bitched out for either not speaking, or not calling someone....ok whatever goes in one ear and out the other mostly. Or like I always say the phone line works both ways. Ok so Im in walmart last night, and lord and behold my mom, and sister barb walk right past me, they didnt even NOTICE ME!!!! I guess they were so caught up in each other, they dont pay no mind to the other part of the family. So being the nice person I am, I say hey. I get oh hey, didnt even see you there. WHATEVER! So immediatly, its all about zach. Well zach didnt want to even look at them, he was fixed on one of the few who actually paid me some attention when I was pregnant. So of course its well we gotta go. Hey wheres tayler? Oh hes around. Glad he was roaming and not there, Im sure something smart would have come out of his mouth, but I dont care anymore, them too need to know how we people feel. And If tayler says it they might actually listen. I swear my dad talked to us more, than those two did. Heres something I dont get.....Why does a 29 yr old have to always take her mother to go grocery shopping with her?!?!?! They didnt have any kids, so why couldnt she go alone? This is a every other weekend thing. I dont understand. I have a 3 month old, that has decided to be awake all day and I go to the grocery store alone. Personally I think a 5,7, and almost 8 yr old is easier to shop with then a three month old, who you have to keep happy. I do it all the time, I just dont understand. All I hear is "oh well shes got the kids" blah blah blah...BULLSHIT! Im sick of hearing that line. How bout this one.....there so far up each other ass, I cant tell where one ends and the other begins. I also get smart ass comments from her husband......like when he sees marge and the first thing he ask her is "wheres your hip attachment"? excuse me? Wheres yours? Ya'll never do anything alone. Let me explain something for the people who cant comprend. Me and Margie, do not work, so therefore, we spend time togethor while our husband are working to keep the bills payd. What is so wrong with doing something togethor when your home bored and have nothing to do. I lean on marge, because 1) She never judges me 2) Shes always there to listen, no matter what and 3)She gives me her opionion only when she thinks I need it. She doesnt tell me well this is what you need to be doing ....blah blah blah, she know I have to learn and make my own mistakes. She never crams or try to force something on me.....She never tells me what im doing wrong, she sits back and lets me find out for myself and thats what makes her my best friend(besides my hubby) and my best sister. Anyways Im done for now, Im sure by tonight, I will have something to bitch bout again......

Suddenly glad we have a venting post!

I am now taking applications for normal people in my family.
All hopes, all dreams and all fantasies of a normal happy family life, just throw that crap out a window, slam the window shut and open a door on new opportunities with new people because most of my family is NUTS! So I hear from Christopher and he's about as high as a kite going to pick up Caleb. I don't get that family at all, then he sees Neil his own dad and walks right up to him and won't even speak! We don't have a family, we have a circus! Then on the other end of the spectrum we have Daddy and Gert run by Gert who is a bitch whore from hell! Then, I have the issues surrounding me and Robert. I don't even want to get into that. Robert and I are perfectly happy and perfectly fine and wonderful, just ask him. Everything's fine there. Then let's expand this out a bit. Let's hit my Uncle Bill who is such an opinionated ass he can't even speak to the family anymore and I get blamed for not talking him!! then we have my kids paternal grandmother, who is the biggest bitch about a family I have ever seen. One wrong word is all it takes to set me off when it comes to my family. No one and I mean NO ONE talks about my family, I don't care who they are especially not some needy opinionated bitch of a woman like her who can put innocent people down left and right and expect to be treated like a queen, she reminds me of the queen of england and I hate that bitch! Gawdy and good for nothing, only C.M. isn't gawdy she's just bitchy. I heard the most rude things about this family. Excuse the fucking hell out of every opinionated asshole who wants to say something but quite honestly Donnella,Stacy,Mike have been nicer to me than some of these so called family connections.
I used to have a hard time with my d-i-law and now after much time I have come to think she's just the coolest thing since the invention of white bread. It's amazing how times change people.
I am just furious with some of the people in this family at the moment. I decided a family are ones chosen not just God given. People need to realize if they say something incredibly mean and hateful sure I might smile at you for the moment but then you will wonder why I never seem to come around anymore, well, that's why!!!! Thank God for normal family like Tayler, April and Zach. Some of my family, No, correction, most of my family is insane and selfish and actually stupid because they don't realize they bite the actually hand that can feed them. It's like "love you love you love you, never want to see you, but here's my life" ah uhmmm,,, no, thanks.
Ok I'm done for now. Thanks to April for putting up a vent post. I would never write this on myspace.

no nitey nite? how long do i wait til i blow up?

ok im blue but i agree with master venter that remembering a damn color is fer the birds when everthing else in life is hittin the shits faster than the wind blows. ^^^^^^
i feel like im walkin on eggshells to see mah daughter and be a part of her life. if i say anything to mike and it gets overheard by mah daughter i end up havn to explain mah self to master jackass who has the sensitivity towards me of a viper. does he not realize that im her mother and need just a wittle bittle bit of common respect but hell no!! lets just treat mommy like a piece of shit of the hind end of a dogs butt! did i get a nitey nite call at 9:30 NO and do ya kno why? becuz i dont have mah phone but still no excuse becuz they kno to call mike but did the phone ring? No! and why? becuz he likes to watch me squirm well i have ah news he can kiss mah ass! i spent all day wondern if he even got mah msgs. i am sik of it^ sik of his shit^ sik of hearing about his shit with other ppl when ive warned the hell out to em bout him and wuz i listned to? hell no! so havn said that i still luv mah baby shes mah girl and always will be and when she grows up and turns on his ass fer bein an asshole to her mom i will laff so hard the ground will explode.